Haven't blogged in awhile. I've been recording a song and writing some others. I am sick as dog right now....sore throat, sinus, cough....fun stuff....

I've got some thoughts ruminating about what I've been reading from John Eldridge's "Wild at Heart." They will have to wait for when I can think coherently....

Questions

Some people are afraid of questions. It's like they think God is going to freak out if they question something the Bible says, or something they have been taught about Him. I'm sorry. God is bigger than that. He is not afraid of your questions.

A lot of the questions that used to trouble me are really paradoxes. A paradox is a statement that seems absurd or self-contradictory but... turns out to be true. A paradox consists of two truths that, when laid side by side, appear to contradict. However, upon further reflection, they prove to be compatible. “While real contradictions are impossible to reconcile, paradoxes are merely difficult to reconcile.” These things just don't bother me like they used to...in fact, I see them as a necessary part of spiritual growth.

Check out some of G.K. Chesterton's writings. He was the king of paradox! Check out some paradoxes of the faith, then if you are interested read this article.

The humble are exalted. The exalted are humbled. “Those who humble themselves will be exalted.” (Luke 14: 11)

Lose your life to find it. Find your life and lose it. “Those who find their life will lose it and those who lose themselves for my sake will find it.” (Matthew10:39)

Slavery leads to freedom. “Having been freed from sin, you became slaves of righteousness.” (Rom. 6:18; cf. 1 Cor. 7:22)

The foolish are wise. “If any one among you think that he is wise in this age, let him become foolish that he may become wise.” (1 Corinthians 3:18; cf. 4:10)

The poor are rich. “Listen, my beloved brethren: did not God choose the poor of this world to be rich in faith and heirs of the kingdom.” (James 2:5)

The weak are strong. “...for when I am weak, then I am strong.” (2 Corinthians 12:10)

Die to live. “...always carrying about in the body the dying of Jesus, that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our body.” (2 Corinthians 4:10)

Give to receive. “It is more blessed to give than to receive.” (Acts 20:35)

The first are last. The last, first. “The last shall be first, and the first last.” (Matthew 20:16; Mark 9:35)

For those who don't think Jesus is in the Pubs....check this out. God is doing some cool things these days...not that He ever stopped.

We had the small group leaders in our church over for some hang-out time and it was so interesting to listen. All of them are great folks! Each using their unique gifts and abilities to help people connect with each other and God. It was so interesting to listen and pick out the vocabulary that gives clues about their levels of spirituality. Many of them still look to the organizational church as the answer to spiritual growth ie. you just need to go to church and participate in the programs to grow spiritually....I'm just in a different place now....but, I'm glad people were patient with me when I was going through that phase. I'll be the first to admit that living in the tension between organizational church and relationship with Jesus is difficult.

Had a good conversation with Trish this afternoon....about trusting God, relationships and roles. There was a time, I am sad to say, that I would have gotten my self-worth from being a "Worship Leader" or a "Youth Leader." Who I was, was tied up in what I did. My role was a big part of who I was. I am realizing more each day that the roles we play really don't mean anything outside of the context of having a relationship with Jesus. If I am a stay-at-home dad, or a worship leader, or a janitor, or a pastor really shouldn't help or hinder my relationship with Jesus (that's easier to say than live out).

Upon some reflection, here is what I come up with...My recent spiritual struggles have come as the result of entering a new stage of faith. Realizing that "going to church" just doesn't cut it anymore; the roles that I placed my self-worth in just place me in a cycle of proving myself over and over again; keeping busy doing "church stuff" is far different from a vocation; the rules and rituals where much of my early faith was formed are shallow and empty.

So there is a process of dieing, of letting go of the old visions and dreams and letting God birth new ones. Because I believe that my relationship with God is paramount I am recommitting to some spritual practices that I've been neglecting. The fact is, that looking back, I can see a gradual drifting from the things that connected me with God in the first place. Because spirituality is not about rituals or rules, but relationship I am renewing my dedication to some of the "monastic" disciplines: prayer, silence, solitude, study, meditation, etc. Refocusing on Christ, opening myself to His ttransforming grace, trying to follow Jesus' example, listen to and obey the Spirit.

Kevin Reeves

For those of you who remember the guy who played drums on the keyboard better than most drummers can play drums for us at Highland Hope, check out Kevin Reeves website. Besides just being a good friend and an all-around awesome guy, he is one of the most talented guys I know. He is making a go of it in Nashville with some other Greenville College alumni. Spread the word....and if you need any music work done contact him!!! Check out his song "Shine."

www.lindseybricker.com is active and working!

Just register, logon and submit a new post. I look forward to reading all the good stuff about Lindsey!

We had a worship service for the youth tonight. Lots of young people wanting to take some steps in their journey. I said, and I repeat: It is not about rules, or rituals, but about relationship. There are lots of people who "don't drink, don't smoke and don't chew"; there are a lot of people who "go to church" religiously. But, the real deal is found in having a relationship with Jesus Christ. Getting to know Him and His purpose for your life, which is being like Him!

Mat 7:21-23 "Knowing the correct password--saying 'Master, Master,' for instance--isn't going to get you anywhere with me. What is required is serious obedience--doing what my Father wills. I can see it now--at the Final Judgment thousands strutting up to me and saying, 'Master, we preached the Message, we bashed the demons, our God-sponsored projects had everyone talking.' And do you know what I am going to say? 'You missed the boat. All you did was use me to make yourselves important. You don't impress me one bit. You're out of here.'

Mat 7:24-28 "These words I speak to you are not incidental additions to your life, homeowner improvements to your standard of living. They are foundational words, words to build a life on. If you work these words into your life, you are like a smart carpenter who built his house on solid rock. Rain poured down, the river flooded, a tornado hit--but nothing moved that house. It was fixed to the rock. "But if you just use my words in Bible studies and don't work them into your life, you are like a stupid carpenter who built his house on the sandy beach. When a storm rolled in and the waves came up, it collapsed like a house of cards."

When Jesus concluded his address, the crowd burst into applause. They had never heard teaching like this.

Lindsey's Blog is almost ready!!!

My friend Blue is setting up a Blog for the family and friends of Lindsey to post their thoughts, memories and prayers. This will be a cool a way to permanently honor her in cyberspace. Stay tuned and I'll let you know when it is ready....

HE IS RISEN!!!!

The Disciples, surrounded by darkness, despair and hopelessness buried a friend on Good Friday. By Sunday everything had changed. Jesus, the Messiah, had risen from the dead! The tomb was empty! There was hope! There was life! There was a future!

The tone of Easter in the Highland, IL area is a little different this year. On Good Friday we buried a friend....but, today there is hope, there is life, there is a future! Lindsey's tomb is not empty, but one day it will be! Today is not about Lindsey, but in the context of the Resurrection of Jesus we can celebrate herfuture hope, and ours too!

The ramifications of the empty tomb don't just lay in the future! We have the possiblity of a new life HERE AND NOW! Our old life is gone, the life of rules, and law, and gritting your teeth to be "good." Jesus has taught a new way to live and backed it up by the power of the Resurrection!

Eph 4:22-24
Since, then, we do not have the excuse of ignorance, everything--and I do mean everything--connected with that old way of life has to go. It's rotten through and through. Get rid of it! And then take on an entirely new way of life--a God-fashioned life, a life renewed from the inside and working itself into your conduct as God accurately reproduces his character in you.

Participate in the Resurrection lifestyle today and everyday!!!!!

Gal 5:22-23
But what happens when we live God's way? He brings gifts into our lives, much the same way that fruit appears in an orchard--things like affection for others, exuberance about life, serenity. We develop a willingness to stick with things, a sense of compassion in the heart, and a conviction that a basic holiness permeates things and people. We find ourselves involved in loyal commitments, not needing to force our way in life, able to marshal and direct our energies wisely.

KINGDOM LIFE BABY!

Thanks for all of the prayers! Our community is dealing with this whole thing as best we can. The wake was last night. Lindsey looked beautiful, like she was sleeping. There were picture collages everywhere. It took us 2 1/2 hours to see her and the family. The line was out the funeral home and half way down the block.

The funeral is today. Pray that we will make it through the song we are singing. Pray for all of the students that are torn to pieces right now. Pray for the family that has lost so much, and gained so much at the same time. Pray that Spirit moves in a miraculous way....

The joyful part of this is that Lindsey was such and awesome kid that love the Lord! She is with Him, worshipping Him with elders, feeling no pain, never to cry a tear again, bathed in the Glory of the Lord, casting her crown before His feet, eating from the Tree of Life...


Before the Throne it was like a clear crystal sea. Prowling around the Throne were Four Animals, all eyes. Eyes to look ahead, eyes to look behind.
Rev 4:7 The first Animal like a lion, the second like an ox, the third with a human face, the fourth like an eagle in flight.
Rev 4:8 The Four Animals were winged, each with six wings. They were all eyes, seeing around and within. And they chanted night and day, never taking a break: Holy, holy, holy Is God our Master, Sovereign-Strong, THE WAS, THE IS, THE COMING.
Rev 4:9 Every time the Animals gave glory and honor and thanks to the One Seated on the Throne--the age-after-age Living One--
Rev 4:10 the Twenty-four Elders would fall prostrate before the One Seated on the Throne. They worshiped the age-after-age Living One. They threw their crowns at the foot of the Throne, chanting,
Rev 4:11 Worthy, O Master! Yes, our God! Take the glory! the honor! the power! You created it all; It was created because you wanted it.

Then the Angel showed me Water-of-Life River, crystal bright. It flowed from the Throne of God and the Lamb,
Rev 22:2 right down the middle of the street. The Tree of Life was planted on each side of the River, producing twelve kinds of fruit, a ripe fruit each month. The leaves of the Tree are for healing the nations.
Rev 22:3 Never again will anything be cursed. The Throne of God and of the Lamb is at the center. His servants will offer God service--worshiping,
Rev 22:4 they'll look on his face, their foreheads mirroring God.
Rev 22:5 Never again will there be any night. No one will need lamplight or sunlight. The shining of God, the Master, is all the light anyone needs. And they will rule with him age after age after age.

Kids are listening to their parents—Their parents' music, that is

'Bout time they wisened up!

Lindsey's showing is Thursday and the funeral is Friday. Here is the newspaper article. Lindsey's mom asked me to sing "I Can Only Imagine." I am praying to get through it. I am working on a song too. Lindsey was a dancer and singer...Lindsey's mom told me the other night that she knows where she is, but is having a hard time letting her go. I think that's a great way to look at it.

Singing With The Angels (Lindsey's Song)

I’ve got so many questions
Every one comes back to why?
There’s so much that I can’t understand
An emptiness that words can’t describe

Chorus:
Knowing where you are
I find the strength to let you go
Cause your singing with the angels
And dancing with the Lord

I'll hold your memories close
I'll trust the promises are true
I'll let your spirit fly
I know one day I'll be with You

Bridge:
Oh, you'll never cry again
Now you fully understand
The only thing there really is to know...

Sounds of hell

I never want to hear the sounds I heard today again. "Slim chance." "You have a choice to make." "Her heart is not beating on it's own." The wailing and weeping of high school students, who have lost their 2nd friend in one year, as the principal announces on the intercom that their friend has died. That sound sends shivers down my spine!

I am numb. I've been with the family and at the high school all day. This sucks. No answers to all of the questions being asked. We are opening up the church building tonight for anyone who wants to hang out, talk, grieve...

I just don't know how to explain to my little girls that the friend they thanked for singing such a beautiful song yesterday is dead today.

Thank you for your prayers concerning Lindsey. She has gone to be with the Lord. The family is going to need constant prayer. Their names are Bob, Jamie, Tyler,Kristin, Sawyer and Bailey. Pray also for our community. Roger and some of our other friends are up at the school helping the kids deal with their grief. Please pray for all.. There are no answers. There is no understanding. This is almost too much to bare.

Thanks for lifting all up. Trish

PLEASE PRAY FOR LINDSEY BRICKER! She is one of our youth and she and her brother were rear ended on the way to school today and she has been given a slim chance. They believe she broke her neck and was having internal bleeding and is now on her way to surgery. She is an amazing young woman and is very loved. She is 15.. Brother Tyler is having neck pain and is beating himself up really badly even though it isn't his fault. Father God, we humbly lift this situation up to you. You are the great physician and healer. We are asking for a miracle. In Jesus Name.......

Subtle Arrogance

In the past few weeks I’ve participated in, or read some disturbing conversations with people that claim to be on a “different spiritual plane” than the rest of us, and therefore are more mature. Mind you, these are good folks who are on a deep spiritual journey, and are misunderstood by some people. I write this just as much for my own benefit because I struggle with some of these issues too. The bottom line is: Maturity is found just as much in what we do, as it is in what we believe.

There is large chasm between what the Church is and what God would like the Church to be. I struggle with this big-time. I’m an Idealist through and through. I also tend toward pessimism. I can make Swiss cheese out of any plan you give me. God has been working on me in this area and here is what I’ve found: Maturity is found in how you deal with the gap between the ideal and the reality. I have a choice. I can whine, moan and bitch about every little thing that falls short of the ideal, or I can do something to change it. That doesn’t mean I won’t ever critique, or discern the problems, but it does mean that once I discern the problem I will do something constructive about it. It doesn’t mean that I won’t deconstruct things that need to be deconstructed, but it does mean that I will attempt to construct something after the deconstruction (What did I just say?).

There is a difference between critiquing something, or someone, and believing that your way is the only way. If you believe that you’ve been made privy to some “hidden knowledge,” that is great (maybe). Crusading against everyone who has a different point of view, or is not as “enlightened” is not a sign of maturity. There are constructive ways and destructive ways to challenge people, and I am seeing a lot of destruction from people that claim to be mature. Maturity is found in “growing in grace and knowledge,” “rebuking with patience,” and humility. Maybe maturity is found in the gentleness and patience we use with those who are not as “spiritually mature” as we are.

There is a subtle arrogance that can creep into our conversations and decision-making processes that reveals our true maturity, or lack of it. Yes, I see things differently. It doesn’t mean that everyone else is wrong. People are in different places on their journey. If God is leading you to believe that you, or your group, are the sole proprietors of truth it’s time to take a humility check. If you’re boasting about “how God revealed to you how little you really know about Him,” it’s still boasting.

Lastly, I think maturity is found in service. Isolating ourselves from the larger body of Christ because “they don’t get it” just reveals our immaturity. Is there a time to separate and try something “new.”? Hell, yeah. But, that doesn’t mean we should let spiritual arrogance keep us from fellowshipping with, encouraging, and teaching those who choose to do church a traditional way, or from those who we perceive as less mature.

Trish and I have some big decisions coming up. Vocation, life direction, God's will, career, medical insurance, church, transformation, and philosophy of life are words on our lips in recent days. I graduate in October which will set in motion a series of events that will force us to make some changes. It's time for us to re-evaluate our philosophy of life; review our past decisions and their consequences; clarify the core values on which we base our decisions. It's a time of awareness, listening, and stillness.

It's interesting to note that the "will of God" in the Bible never talks about our immediate circumstances, but about having our character transformed (many times through suffering). Here are a few recommended steps from pamphlet that Henry Drummond wrote:

1. PRAY
2. THINK
3. TALK TO WISE PEOPLE, but do not regard their decision as final.
4. BE AWARE OF THE BIAS OF YOUR OWN WILL, but do not be too much afraid of it. God never unnecessarily thwarts one's nature and likings, and it is a mistake to think that His will is in the line of the disagreeable.
5. IN THE MEANTIME< DO THE NEXT THING, for doing God's will in small things is preparation for doing it in great things.
6. WHEN DECISION AND ACTION are necessary, GO AHEAD.
7. NEVER RECONSIDER your decision whe it is finally acted upon.
8. You will probably not find out till afterwards, perhaps long afterwards, that you were led at all.

Gotta love #8!

This weekend we went to visit with Trish's Brother-In-Law who just got back from Iraq. He is a captain in the 101st in charge of a battalion of cannons. He won a bronze star for "doing his duty". That means he pulled a family of civilians out of a burning ammo dump that exploded while they were looting it for the metal. Listening to him talk about his experience, and seeing the pictures from over there was really interesting. It becomes really obvious that the news reports a slanted story. The bottom line is death, blood, destruction and sex sells, humanitarian aid and construction just don't make the news. While I think the US Govt. has other motives for being over there, it was cool to get another point of view.

We also had dinner with the folks from our worship team. It was nice just to hang out, share, learn some songs and talk about spiritual things. Knowing a little bit about the stages of faith is helping me to be more patient with people. Seeing them on the same journey, but in a different place is allowing me to see people in our city from a different perspective. These are good people who haven't had the experiences that I've had. Not that I'm better, or more advanced, but just in a different place. I used to just get pissed-off because people weren't "serious" about their faith, but the truth is that they have had a flawed model of what faith looks like.

While I still desire to have some "like-minded" people to journey with, maybe surrounding myself with like-minded people is a form of isolation. Maybe not so different from institutional church's isolation from the rest of the culture.

I have been revisiting Fowler's theories about stages of faith. Through hundreds of interviews Fowler was able to determine that people of all religions go through similar stages of faith. The bottom-line is that when we are "saved" we begin a progressive and predictable journey toward Christ-likeness. Communities also seem to go through a similar pattern, as evidenced by Israel. So, these stages become guides and tools of where individuals and communities are in their spiritual growth toward Christ-likeness.

The really interesting part is that the last two stages, Conjunctive and Universal, are evidenced by a detachment from the groups where "faith" has taken place, and a increasingly singular faith in God. My first thought was that the institutional church has a vested interest in not helping people reach these last two levels of faith! I asked Prof. Thompson about this theory and he smiled and said, "People who reach these levels of faith cause pastor's a lot of trouble." People in these stages of faith begin to challenge the pastor's/denomination's teachings, practices and motives. These people will either choose to live in the conflict of their consciousness and commitments, or they will leave and forego their commitments to seek the "deeper life."

Thompson believes individuals, groups and churches go through each of the faith stages. The stages cannot be skipped. The stages are progressive, and some stages may be permanent, depending on the conditions of spiritual growth. Additionally, Fowler believes that the advanced stages are a result of cooperation with the Spirit. Therefore, these stages portray ways in which God intends to call individuals, groups and churches to maturity of knowing, moral development. Israel (the nation) and Jesus (an individual) are representative of the process.

Looking deeper into these stages, I can definitely see my own journey and those of people I am journeying with... I can also see more clearly the stage of faith of my church....


Primal Stage – Genesis – Birth Stories of Jesus – Decision to be a Christ-follower
 Represents maximum human dependency; maximum care by others, including God.
 Genesis - The beginning of Salvation History for the Hebrew/Israelite/Jew.
 Jesus birth.
 Decision is made to follow Christ.

Intuitive-Projective – Call of Fathers(Creeds) – Journey to/from Egypt – Romance/Setting Apart
 Babies learn that “others” are out there, with whom to interact.
 Call of Abraham and the verbally repeated in Israel’s creeds of Duet. 6:20-25 and Duet. 26::5-10. Call of Abraham and Egyptian slavery.
 Jesus journeys to and from Egypt. (Math. 2:14-15)
 The follower learns that he is “called” and “set apart,” but is still largely dependent on “other people like him.” This is often a time of joy and bliss.

Mythic-Literal – Exodus, Sinai Stories – Jesus Returns to Nazareth - Non-negotiable Faith
 One learns stories and ways of acting which define one’s family and group identity.
 Stories of the Exodus and Sinai celebrated in Passover and the Feast of Weeks form Israel’s identity as a nation/people and develop a national consciousness.
 Jesus returns to Nazareth. (Math. 2:19-23)
 The follower begins to take on the stories, beliefs and observances that symbolize belonging to the community. Beliefs and morality are appropriated with literal interpretations.

Synthetic-Conventional – Wandering and Conquest – Jesus Grows and is Baptized – Loyalty to Group
 Loyalties to persons or groups from the core of one’s identity. Strong attachment to ideals and rules.
 Israel begins to establish the parameters of what it means to be God’s people in the 40 years of wandering and the conquest of Israel. This is reinforced in Sukkoth (Feast of Booths) and Bar Mitzpha.
 Jesus “grew and became strong in spirit, filled with wisdom.” (Lk. 2:40) Jesus is Bar Mitzphad (Lk. 2:42ff.)
 The follower experiences a synthesis of Church, Bible, stories, and experience to form faith. Faith is likely to be “rule based” with strong identification with a particular group/church.

Individuative-Reflective – Davidic Covenant and Prophetic Movement – Jesus’ Ministry and Death – Awareness of Other Faiths Persons develop skills for dealing with theirs and others faith and ideas.
 King David’s ambassadors bring other cultural ideas to Israel (Solomon’s wives).
 Jesus’ ministry challenges the social, economic and religious practices of contemporary Judaism. (Parable of the Good Samaritan – Be a Jew, but act like a Samaritan.)
 The follower becomes aware of, examines, and deals with the contradictions and ramifications of other faiths and beliefs.

Conjunctive Faith – Sabbath - Messianic Promise – Death, Resurrection, Ascension, and Final Return of Jesus – Reconciliation of Faith
 Emotional, behavioral, societal and religious opposites and contradictions meet and are reconciled.
 Israel’s concept of the Sabbath is the weekly meeting in the presence of God for prayer and thought.
 Jesus’ death, Resurrection, Ascension and Return are the ultimate reconciliation of all Creation.
 The follower’s faith insists on humility, based on the fact that the grasp on ultimate truth that any tradition can offer needs continual correction and challenge. The follower may also acknowledge that paradox and apparent contradictions are intrinsic to that truth. Deep faith to a particular tradition, with openness to the truths of other traditions.

Universalizing Faith – Eschaton - Eternal Kingdom
 Oneness with God. Possible tension with the religious system as consciousness and commitments, love and loyalties conflict.
 Jesus’ exists as the eternal ultimate reality, the Reconciler of all things.
 The follower experiences a “radical decentration of self,” widening inclusiveness of the circle that counts as “neighbors”. The follower experiences a radical shift in values as a detachment from causes, institutions, persons and posessions is replaces with love for the Creator. Manifests the fruits of “kenosis,” the “pouring out” or emptying of self. Total and pervasive response to God’s love.
 Fowler suggest that a very small percentage of people actually attain this level of faith. He suggest Gandhi as an example.

"God will not suffer man to have the knowledge of things to come; for if he had prescience of his prosperity he would be careless; and understanding of his adversity he would be senseless."

You are Augustine! You love to study tough issues and don't mind it if you lose sleep over them. Everyone loves you and wants to talk to you and hear your views, you even get things like "nice debating with you." Yep, you are super smart, even if you are still trying to figure it all out. You're also very honest, something people admire, even when you do stupid things.

What theologian are you?

A creation of Henderson

Well, not everyone loves me.....

Taken from the inner walls of one of the concentration camps in Nazi Germany at the end of the Second World War, this prayer was scratched by an unknown hand:

O Lord, when I shall come with glory into your kingdom, do not remember only the men of good will;
remember also the men of evil. May they be remembered not only for their acts of cruelty in this camp, the evil they done to us prisoners, but balance against their cruelty the fruits we have reaped under the stress and in the pain; the comradeship, the courage, the greatness of heart, the humility and patience which have been born in us and become part of our lives, because we have suffered at their hands.

May the memory of us not be a nightmare to them when they stand in judgment.
May all that we have suffered be acceptable to you as a ransom for them.

And then the writing concluded, "Unless a grain of wheat falls into the ground and die..."

This is joy and suffering; this is the love of God and neighbor.

Excerpt for Fowler's "Becoming Adult, Becoming Christian."